I don’t know about you, but I find myself often giving advice I don’t follow. It wasn’t until someone was complaining to me about how they know all the tips and tricks, how they know how to overcome what they’re going through but just can’t, did I realize, how many times has that happened to me? Why is it so much easier to offer help to others than ourselves?
Spoiler alert: I don’t know.
The more I think about this, I come up with less answers and more questions:
- Why is it that we can find ourselves quickly giving encouragement and words of wisdom to others but when it’s ourselves feeling down we can’t seem to listen?
- Is it because we don’t believe it?
- Is it because we think we’re suffering more than someone else?
- Or is it that we’re just so debilitated that we feel like we can’t help ourselves?
In another post of mine, Our Story Isn’t Meant For Us, I spoke about the encouragement of others and how important it is to support the community.
- Maybe what we need is the encouragement to come from someone else to affirm what we’re feeling isn’t silly or nonsense but true and valid.
- Maybe we need someone who can relate so that we don’t feel so alone.
- Maybe we are so hard on ourselves that we think we’re ultimately helpless and that there’s no point in trying.
I know this post is short but I also know that it strikes deep. I don’t mean to sway someone from one belief to another, but I do want you to know that your feelings are valid too.
Just because you feel like you can’t get up doesn’t mean that you deserve not to. And just because you feel like you can’t help yourself doesn’t mean you’re helpless. Everything takes time, healing is not linear; there are going to be ups and downs in life but just because we get down doesn’t mean we stay down.
You are stronger than you realize and you’re going to get through this. We all are.